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Female orgasm: why does not it come?


Female Orgasm: How To Awaken Your Orgasmic Potential Asleep?


Many women see orgasm as something unattainable. They are experiencing an emotional drama because they can not get there and imagine that orgasm is a state never reached, but that many people say they experience. As if it were a legend. They wonder: Is this the orgasm? Is this feeling insignificant? Many doubts pass in the head of the woman who do not have orgasms.

 


Main causes

Among the main causes of lack of female orgasm are:

-Mom ejaculates too fast and does not give enough time for the woman to reach the climax of pleasure

-Lack of understanding of one or both partners on how the female sexual organ works

-More communication about sex (talk about what kind of stimulation a person likes)

-Problems in relationships such as conflict or lack of trust

-Assessment about sexual performance

-Min to relax, surrender and get out of control

– A traumatic physical or emotional memory (eg sexual abuse)

– Psychological disorders with depression

– Physical damage to the spinal cord, changes in the genitals, multiple sclerosis or diabetes


Most causes are psycho-emotional rather than physical

For centuries, female sexuality is surrounded by a prohibitive moral fog, which blames pleasure and self-knowledge related to sexuality itself.
So it is no wonder that in the 21st century, 50% of Brazilian women report not masturbating and 40% report that they can not reach orgasm.

But when there is no significant physical damage in orgasm-related enervations, the lack of orgasms is related, in its overwhelming majority, to psycho-emotional causes. This means that the female orgasm often does not happen because of psycho-emotional issues.

It is as if there is a self-boycott unconscious of our own pleasure.


But where do these causes come from?

There is a bell of alert within us women when we begin to feel pleasure. This bell is usually an alert, a warning, a repression from an inner voice that does not give us the permission to feel pleasure. It is a voice that boycott sensory experience. A voice that takes us out of the field of sensations and into the mental field of judgments and classifications. Then there is a widespread boycott of female orgasms.

After all sorts of mental lucubrations, the feeling that usually gets in such cases is guilt or fear.


But guilty of what? Why does it influence the female orgasm?

Sometimes the blame is for feeling “dirty”, feeling “impure”, feeling “whore”. After all, it is not “right” for a woman to indulge in pleasure. “What would Mom think if she saw me coming here and moaning like that?” It’s almost terrifying to imagine such a scenario.
But make no mistake about it. For this guilt has been built from generations long before his mother. It comes from a few centuries and has very deep roots in our unconscious.

Many women died at the stake fighting this construction. Many women were raped, beaten, tried and criminalized for defending the right to equality and freedom.


Fear of what?

Sometimes it’s the fear of being free. It is very common for fear of emotions to take over in a moment of climax of pleasure. An agonizing sensation of trying to keep in control.

After all, what will happen if I give myself totally and let all this energy flow come to light? What will my partner think of me? What will be revealed if I let it all explode?

Fear of losing control is often associated with a lack of trust in the partner. It is as if it is something too intimate to be shared. For it may be that my true self reveals itself to me, and the person who is with me may not like what he sees.


But how to get rid of it?

Fortunately, we live in an era when we have the strength to break free from these backward, prohibitive, boycotting constructs. Today the world is not perfect but it is a little fairer, more free and with much knowledge available.

It is possible to rescue our sacred femininity in a healthy and healing way. There is no miracle. But a constant work of reaffirmation, of self-worthiness and self-love can transform our sexuality. That is why it is necessary to give more value to oneself, to honor one’s own body. Honoring one’s own sexuality.

We need to reconnect as our yoni and admire the sacredness in our genitals.
For those who do not know, yoni, in Sanskrit (millennial Eastern language) means the portal of life. It’s a new-old concept for the vagina. A new mindset for sexuality.

The vagina stops being something dirty, improper, ugly, to become something sacred, a portal through which life is born.
So we need to reinforce that concept.


Some simple and powerful exercises:

Look more in the mirror, know your vagina better, love it. Tell her nice little things as she looks at her: “I love you, my beautiful one. I accept you. You’re beautiful, hot … Power source! “


Take some time to get to know your pleasure mechanisms better: touch your yoni with love, feel it part by part, in an almost meditative process. Know the sensations of the touch on the lips, the touch on the clitoris, the touch on the vaginal rings … finally, explore and learn your own mechanisms to later transmit this knowledge to your partner.
A new and beautiful relationship with yourself will be born. Gradually the merit of pleasure and self-love will take the place of guilt and fear. So, who knows, orgasms will not become a more present reality in your life?


Read also: How Tantric Massage Can Heal Your Relationships

 

There are even techniques for couples, where both men and women can learn more about female or male orgasms, tantric massage techniques, and practices that enhance the connection, intimacy, and pleasure of the couple. To learn them, know our Course of Tantric Sexuality and Massage.

 


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